Another thing I felt ...

Another thing I felt guilty about was my distaste for being around people who drooled and a lot of children with cerebral palsy, down syndrome or other disabilities drool. Let me explain. My mother had a sister with down’s syndrome. Every six weeks she came to our house to spend Sunday with us. After church we would pick her up at St. Joseph’s Infant Home, where she lived and helped with laundry and other domestic chores. Then we would bring her to our house for the day. Mom’s brothers and sisters all took a different Sunday and everybody tried to include her in family events. This was normal for me and I loved having her with us. This also led my mother to volunteer at the Home for the Mentally Retarded every week. When I got older she wanted me to come with her to volunteer too. I went one time. So many of the people there drooled and I couldn’t stand it, so I refused to go back. And guess what? Angie drooled for many years. She had to always wear a bib with a waterproof lining to keep her clothes dry. There were days when I figured that God gave me Angie to make me more tolerant and accepting.

Support Groups and a New Baby

Through time in the waiting room at UCP Preschool and Mothers of Special Children, I had developed amazing friends. These friends understood the day to day struggles. They understood the work required to be a caregiver to a child with special needs. They were sounding boards for therapy discussions and other challenges. They were fun and joyful and we had such a good time together. Angie, John and I were surrounded by these great friends, my parents and extended family.  We were in a good place. I was remarried and about to give birth to another adorable baby boy who we would name Matthew. Angie became the baby watcher and would make noise if baby Matt was about to get into trouble and John would get him and me whatever we needed. John and Angie were the best helpers ever. Fun times for sure!

12/7/18

Thoughts about Money

I imagine that you are curious about how we survived financially in the those first five years. Money is always such a challenge. Initially, when we moved back to my Mom and Dad’s house, Dad put us on his insurance. In fact, he kept working beyond his planned retirement age, so he could do that. As time went on and we all realized that Angie’s needs were far too great to manage even with his insurance, we decided together that I needed to get into the welfare system known as Aid to Dependent Children and Medicaid. You can imagine that UCP Preschool, therapy, and doctor visits would have been very expensive even 40 years ago. I couldn’t work for years and John and Angie’s father was nowhere to be found. He never supported his kids for a minute. So, I got us set up for government aid, including food stamps. My parents and I were very grateful for the help.

Angie's special shoes made to help stop her ankles from turning inward